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Cute Funny Status Messages

'Post these best, funny, cute and naughty status messages to make sure they like, share, comment and retweet.'
  • I am not dying for a stable relationship but yes.. a stable connectivity matter a lot!
  • If we make social networking blogs for animals, their status would be like:
    Chicken: If you don't find any status update from my side, It means I am being served at restaurant.
    Mosquito: Somehow skipped from someone's footsteps. Huh! There is so much risk and danger in life.
    Cat: My 10th kitten is asking her dad's name. I don't even remember!
    Pig: Oh Gosh, they throw the gossips that I'm spreading flu.. What the hell!
    Dog: It's raining!
  • Free Food? with WiFi? Okay, I'll go.
  • oh I’m sorry! i didn’t realise you were giving me a dirty look…i just thought you were ugly like that all the time!!
  • Really thankful to school for teaching us texting without looking.
  • If you think I hate you... I probably do, Goodbye.
  • Just Wondering that she is 18 and pregnant will come back on 34 as grand-mom.
  • Love is quite strange and funny thing. No matter how hard I try and try, I just can't say goodbye.
  • You must learn swimming because you're missing 3/4 of the world.
  • Hard work never kills you - it just keeps you away from social networks!
  • You are a proof that God has a good sense of humor.
  • I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
  • Shout out to all the 90's baby's, with no babies!
  • Remember me? I was your friend - when you were single.
  • I'm actually quite pleasant until I'm awake.
  • Celebrating Valentine’s Day with my liver.
  • I finally figured out what mosquitoes are for - they are God's way to make us slap ourselves!
  • Keep your head high and your middle finger higher.
  • Some things man was never meant to know. For everything else, there's Google.
  • Yes, I know I can't sing. Yes, I'm going to keep singing anyway.
  • I am practicing my signature over and over again , in case I become famous.
  • Roses are red. Foxes are clever. I want your hug, let me do it forever.
  • I wonder if the earth teases other planets for having no life.
  • Party instructions: Walk in. Eat as much as you can. Walk out.
    Girl: "I love you" Boy: "I love me too"
  • Everyone has that one friend that makes them LOL.
  • For every male action, there is a female overreaction.
  • I want to surround myself with funny people and make sure everyone has a good time.
  • For others it may Valentine's Day, but for me it's Thursday.
  • The amount of sleep required by the average person is just five minutes more.
  • I'm writing a story about a man with a small garden. It doesn't have much of a plot.

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