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Entertaining Evan Esar Quotes

'Now, time to enjoy the very entertaining humor quotes of Evan Esar's (American humorist).'

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

The quizzical expression of the monkey at the zoo comes from his wondering whether he is his brother's keeper, or his keeper's brother.

Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either.

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

A husband is like a fire--he goes out when unattended.

Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose.

Play: Work that you enjoy doing for nothing.

The mint makes it first, it is up to you to make it last.

A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much.

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a rich widow.

[Anger is] the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind.

Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment.

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.