Funny Short One Liner Jokes/Quotes

'Sometimes one right line is good enough to break the ice. Here presenting those great short one liner funny jokes and quotes to let you have best time ever.'

What do you call a bunch of liberals in a basement? A whine cellar.

What is faster Hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch a cold.

It's funny the way most people love the dead. Once you're dead, you're made for life.
- Jimi Hendrix

You cannot play with me unless you blow me. I am Balloon!

I have a friend named Kay. We call him K for short.

Wanna hear a joke? women's rights.

As you grow older, you stand for more and fall for less.

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!

I can handle pain until it hurts.

The shortest horror story: The last person on earth sat in a room. There was a knock at the Door.

I say no to alcohol, it just doesn’t listen.

Due to budget cuts and downsizing, the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.

Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is black.

Mouth is in gear, brain is in neutral.

I just let my mind wander, and it didn’t come back.

I'm on a 30-day diet. So far I've lost 15 days.

You cannot taste me, until you undress me. Regards - Banana.

Yo mama's so short, she don't roll dice, she pushes them.

Why can't helen keller drive? because she's a woman

How do you make a dead baby float? One scoop dead baby, one scoop ice cream, add root beer.

Why am I single? Because I treat girls right.

It's easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

Creditors have better memories than debtors.

An argument carried far enough will end up in semantics.

I am born a pessimist - My blood group is B Negative.

What's the difference between a liberal and a puppy? The puppy stops whining when it grows up.

According to my best recollection, I don't remember.