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Never Heard Before

Here, we come again with very fresh and never heard before jokes mixed with lovely quotations. This earth is always having some great show and your life is a ticket for them. SO don't miss it. When you response in as joyful way, means that you are living in a good way. The birth of new era takes place within ourselves. Always remember the secret of doing great things is doing them with perfect focus and a little break. Doing focus is your part and making you entertain is our part. So here we move:

On the first night of marriage:
Man: Dear, Do I have permission?
Wife: Yes!
Husband: Keep his work like crazies till morning and his wife gets unwell.
Next day they go to in-laws home.
After dinner, man asks from his mother in law: Now, do I have permission?
Wife: Shouts, Dad, don;t give him permission!

Dad:from where u bring this new chair?
Son:yesterday i go to interview they said to me take your seat.so, I took the new chair. submitted by: saivamsi

In a stormy night!
Man reaches at pizza shop..
Waiter: Are you married?
Man: Of-course! It is common sense. Otherwise no mother would have sent her son to buy pizza in this kind of dangerous night!

4 crazy men were running to pick-up the train. Two out of them were catch the train. People said: well done!
They said: It is not because another two wanted to go and we were just came to see-off them!

Man: Yesterday night, one man me robbed with on knife point.
Another: But you always keep gun with you.
Man: Yes, but I hided it from get it stolen.

Village girl: What is this sent message?
Another: Oh no, IT is so simple, sent message means perfumed message!

One man gets very angry from his dog and decides to leave.
He takes his dog to very far road and leaves.
When he reaches home back, he finds the dog is at home.
He again goes and leaves the dog at very big forest but when he comes back to home, he find dog again at home.
Now this time, he decides to leave him on a very complicated place, and he was on his way to return home, he calls his wife and asks if the dogs comes back?
His wife says: yes..
He asks his wife to send the dog as I forget the way!

An angry guy was sitting in park doing nothing.
His friend comes and asks: Hey what are you doing here?
Guy: I am taking a revenge!
Friend: To whom?
Guy: From Time!
Friend:How?
Guy: Time has spoiled me, now I am spoiling the time!

Foe beautiful Eyes: Look for positive in others!
For beautiful Lips: Speaks words that makes everyone feel good!
And for Wisdom: Motivate everyone and let let them feel ignored!

Read more Funny Quotes to have lot of laughter.

Live Today

Year ends, new year starts! Some are happy, some are sad while others are looking forward to make more great life ahead. Time flies very fast but you can use it best by living 'TODAY'. It is the best day because present matters a lot in our lives. We do lots of hard work to make our future bright and strong but we forget to enjoy our daily hours. There is always something in everything you can enjoy. So re-look your mission statements and do necessary amendments. It is not your birthday when you should feel special, instead try to make every day, every hour special. Change your routine life and add something creative. Seriousness doesn't always bring good results, but sometimes being funny works.

There are some really good things everyone can try, and those are:

1. Be gentle and put your views in soft way.
2. Family comes first, after all you do big efforts to make their lives easy.
3. Love is essential part of life so never forget to value it.
4. Give importance to discipline and understand the importance of time.
5. Appraise people for their good things.
6. Accept the people the way they are.
7. Never lose confidence, you are unique and best.
8. Keep faith in God and done' be restless.
9. Never compromise with honesty ad integrity.
10. Don't be harsh and rude, in anger, try to leave that place.
11. Without having a laugh, your day is wasted. Remember that!

Apply these simple but very important habits in your life and be an idol for everybody.

Here are some users submitted jokes to make you giggle:

what do you call a deer with no eyes?
A no idear! What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idear!
submitted by: Anna

All Hilarious Funny Quotes

'Now it is your turn to enjoy while reading, watching and sharing these funny hilarious quotes and images because humor is real life. Things never happen itself, so humor! You have to make effort to make people laugh. Amusement, fun and comedy are great tool to win their hearts. You can use them to get success in every affair of your life. You can be more lovable and well-known person. So never hesitate and live life in a wonderful way. Your efforts can make their day so happy and delightful. It costs nothing. Wish you good luck.'

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In Response to your request for Bigger cabin
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Best Place for Haircut
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Then things get worse
We are born naked wet and hungry Then things get worse
'People ask the secret of our long marriage
Secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. She goes Tuesdays I go Fridays.
Sometimes Your Face
Sometimes Your face attracts my fist
Are you Coming?
Are you coming? Nope I am busy. There is going to be Food! OK. I will come.
Today's Gen
I hate today’s Generation where  phones are Smart but people are Dumb!

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Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
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I would rather cuddle than to have..
I would rather cuddle than to have... If you're good in grammar you will get it

He took me from a bar.
funny sayings on He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine

Anger makes your mouth work faster than your mind
Anger makes your mouth work faster than your mind

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